How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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