i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Blood and glitter go together right?
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize
