btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
