Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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