she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize