trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I lost the right to judge tonight
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
