I wish my penis had an off switch
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize