So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Randomize
