as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
