dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
