Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize