Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
