every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
