you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
