just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize