I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
