Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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