Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
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I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
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My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
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