three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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