Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
they're like a gay fantastic four
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
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