Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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