You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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