brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
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