Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
