New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
