i don't like sucking hair
Me. At least after what I've been through.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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