Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Boobs are out for the taking
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
