i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize