Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize