Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize