Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
