I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
