Sry I called you an 8
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize