dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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