Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Just high enough for therapy.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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