i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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