Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
