who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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