Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
