Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Randomize
