she was so not down for the gang bang
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
