He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
