What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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