am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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