Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
