We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
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