Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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