What did we do last night that was yellow?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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