you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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