Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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