They have a pepper shaker for pot.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize