Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
